That Was a Bloody Good Shot Butch!

Today was Butch's day! I asked him to make sure that he packed his golf clubs for our Where's Waldo ... I mean ... Where's Sharon trip. I wanted to make sure that he did something that HE enjoys on our secret get-away. He's been through too much the last 3 weeks. He needed some "Butch Time". Before we pulled out of our driveway yesterday morning at 3:30 a.m., I asked for him to show me his golf clubs in the trunk. I know my Butch. He wouldn't want to take away from the time that I had on the beach or time away from being together to play golf. BUT I wanted him to! Yes, they were in there!

This morning, we said goodbye to the beach and our incredible room and headed to the golf course. What a beautiful day. The wind was blowing in a cool breeze and the sun was shining. It was the perfect day for a round of golf or in my case, a perfect day for being chauffeured around in a golf cart while drinking a Wild Berry Smoothie!

I want to remind everyone that I took a golf course when I was a freshman at Longwood College. Now, I must admit that I may have not been as honest as I should have been when I documented my score, but none-the-less, I know about golf. Not only am I a Stonewall Jackson High School golf player's wife, I am Bradley's mom ... a Central High School top golf player. We went all over with Bradley when he was on a traveling golf team. The boys had their share of putt putt when they were little. Butch showed them the spot at Johnny Appleseed putt putt golf range where they were to hit for a perfect hole in one. Gregory participated in Hook a Kid On Golf one summer too.

                            Here are some memory photos of golf in years past......

 

Bradley and Gregory playing putt putt golf

Gregory, Bradley and my brother Danny when they played golf in Virginia Beach

 

                                       Gregory at Hook a Kid On Golf Camp
                           Bradley in a tournament when he was on the traveling golf team


Today, the golf course was quite the happen' spot so when Butch went to tee off, he suggested to the starter that he begin on the back 9. It was just the two of us. We were able to giggle, laugh, smile and enjoy the sunshine. We were able to try and forget about the "thing" that has drastically changed our lives.

On one of the holes, Butch strategically positioned the golf cart behind a tree so that if a ball came off the driving range in the wrong direction, I would be protected. Now let me ask you ladies, do I have the Most Wonderful Husband in the World or what?

Then the front 9. It was still rather crowded so the starter put Butch with a group of 3 other players. Although the first 9 holes that Butch played was special time with just the two of us, it was the cherry on top of the cake for him to play the last 9 with other golfers. But these gentlemen weren't just "other golfers". They were military guys and to be quite honest, there isn't anyone that Butch admires more than men and women that defend our country. Nigel was from the Royal Air Force. He had the most awesome accent! I actually wrote down some of his phrases so that I wouldn't forget them. When Butch hit a good shot, Nigel said, "That was a bloody good shot Butch!" (Can you hear him with the accent?) Danny and Dave were from the Navy. What an honor for Butch to play 9 holes of golf with men (boys in my eyes because they were all close to Bradley's age) who serve our country. What an honor for Butch to have a memory of such a special weekend that included time with these guys.

Whenever I hear the word Navy, my chest is filled with pride because my dad absolutely LOVED his time in the Navy.

Henry J. Lafferty, Navy

Whenever Butch hears the word "military", he thinks about his childhood when his dad was in the Army. Butch was born in Fort Bragg, N.C. and spent time in Fort Seal, Oklahoma.

                                                        Isaac E. Funk, Sr., Army


It was a beautiful day on Red Wing Golf Course! Butch and I had a "Bloody Good Time!"

Where in the World is Sharon?

Where's Sharon? She's not answering her home phone...I called. She's didn't answer her door...I knocked. She's not in her flower beds...I looked.

Wait, I just got some clues handed to me. Can you help me figure this mystery out? Can you help me figure out Where in the World is Sharon?

Clue #1 *** It looks like this is taken from the passenger side of her car. It's dark so it must be in the early hours of the morning. Perhaps 3:30 a.m.??? Where in the World is Sharon?

Clue #2 *** It appears that her husband Butch is driving their car. Where oh where is Butch taking her? Where in the World is Sharon?

Clue #3 *** It looks as if they are going into some sort of tunnel. When they come out, will they still be in Virginia? Where in the World is Sharon?

Clue #4 *** They're sitting on a bench eating. She looks happy, real happy.  Is that a bagel with turkey and cheese that they bought from Food Lion to make themselves a sandwich? Where in the World is Sharon?

Clue #5 *** Ah, her pink sparkling toes are in something fine. Could it be...could it really be?

 Alas....We found her. Butch took her to Virginia Beach!

Soup and Tea Will Make You Feel Better

When Loren (soon to be daughter-in-law) went to visit the 1st grade class and the phenomenal cooperating teacher that she did her student teaching with at Catoctin last week, she brought back Get Well cards made by the class. I now have the most vibrant rainbows to dance on! While each and every card was the BEST, one student made a powerful suggestion. "I miss you. Maybe having some soup and tea will help. I hope you get well soon. Play games so you will stop thinking about being sick." I miss you too precious little ones. I have been eating soup...in fact I made a pot of chicken noodle soup on Monday, and am drinking a lot of green tea with agave sugar. Now I just need to get those games out and start playing!

We left at 6:10 this morning to head to Winchester for the Brain MRI. They put  a helmet that had a chin guard on me. They also put headphones on so that I could to listen to music while having the MRI. The technician originally said that I wouldn't need a contrast put in, but half way through the procedure, he changed his mind. He said that the purpose of the contrast is to check for metastatic cancer???? Later when he apologized for causing alarm by giving me the contrast, I asked what metastatic meant. He said that the pancreas was the original point of cancer and the contrast will help to see if it has spread. I really wasn't alarmed. Do what you have to do so that I can have the FACTS. He said that my oncologist will be able to pull the image up immediately through the computer but the actual radiologist report won't be ready for a couple of days.

After the MRI, I stopped by the oncologist office to beg for more pain medicine. I only had 3 pills left because I have had to significantly increase the frequency of the medication. My pain level has majorly increased since this whole "thing" has started. My gut goes into spasms more often, actually taking my breath away. I remember when my mom had lung cancer, she would often "moan" in pain. I vowed to myself that I would not moan through this experience. Well, I'm so sorry mom for being hard on your moaning because NOW I know what it's like when the pain hits and actually makes me cry out loud. I'm not technically "moaning", it's more like a vocal plea for help when the spasm hits. My back and shoulder blades now hurt along with my gut.

My oncologist must be off "playing games" today because he wasn't at work. He wasn't there to pull the Brain MRI results up and call me to say what was what. Let's hope that he isn't going to be "playing games" again tomorrow because that means I won't know anything until Monday. Patience Grasshopper...I know Butch, I'm trying.

"S" stands for Sharon

We have a very talented artist at school, who doubles as a kindergarten assistant during the day. She is making scrabble tiles and wooden pin angels with the color ribbon that represents the type of cancer or disease. Last year, I ordered "J" to represent my mom "Joan" with a white ribbon for lung cancer. I wore it everyday on my school lanyard.

A week before my diagnosis, I order 4 more scrabble tiles: "B" /gray ribbon for my Uncle Bob who had brain cancer, "J" /pink ribbon for my Aunt Judy who had breast cancer, "M" / yellow ribbon for my Aunt Marie who had bone cancer and "H" / red ribbon for my dad who had heart disease. Little did I know that soon I would be wearing "S" / purple ribbon for Sharon to represent pancreatic cancer. Truly didn't see my jewelry collection expanding with a new scrabble tile.

 

If you would like to order a scrabble tile or wooden angel, please email mary.longerbeam@lcps.org
She will be able to give you the details!

Making my own fashion statement

This morning, I woke up with Butch and pretended that I was getting ready for work. He left and then I was out the door about 40 minutes later for a hot date in Winchester. Little did I know that it REALLY was going to be a HOT date.

The first thing they did at the radiation oncologist's office was x-rays. Lying flat on a table with my arms over my head, I held onto two pegs. While doing this, the technician formed a pillow around my head and raised arms. The pillow then became a hard mold for all of my treatments. So interesting! Then the technician got out her black sharpie pen for a little drawing lesson. Who needs to spend money on a belly button ring when you could have permanent black sharpie lines and X's on your tummy for free (well the "free" part isn't exactly true but work with me here)?  I'm making my own fashion statement. I even have clear tape over the black sharpie marks so that they stay on for the next 6 weeks. My boys will probably remind me of all the times I told them when they were little to NEVER write on the walls with markers. They're probably saying, "Um Mom, sharpie on your body with a permanent marker? Where does that fall into the rules?"

After the x-rays, my hard mold with handles got to sit in the wheelchair as the technician and I walked up to get the CT scan. Again lying on the table in "MY MOLD"...not to be confused with a jello mold...an IV was inserted. I've never had a CT scan before so this was a new experience. The technician said that I'll feel something throughout my body that will feel warm as well as a metallic taste in my mouth. She said that I'll get a warm feeling in my bum too. As the contrast went through my body in a zigzag motion, I thought, okay bladder sling, don't give out on me now. It was such an unique feeling throughout my body. It was over before I knew it.

My mold got preferential seating once again in the wheelchair as the tech and I walked back down to the office. Results from today's x-rays and CT, as well as the results from Thursday's brain MRI, will become the "plan" for radiation. I go back to the radiation oncologist on Monday at 9:15 for my final markings. That's when I get my permanent tattoos. Butch and I will once again head back to Winchester Monday afternoon for my appointment with Dr. Major at which time he'll give me the prescription for the chemo...which I'll need because I START RADIATION AND CHEMOTHERAPY ON TUESDAY, MAY 15TH at 2:00!!!! In one week from today, the "thing" will be attacked and any "other little things" that may have decided to travel in my body will be attacked also. The war is about to begin and I WILL WIN!

Are you ready for ANOTHER Miracle?

Today we met initially with the nurse and then the radiation oncologist, Dr. Straus. The nurse told us that Dr. Staus may need to have a CT scan done first in order to help her in "planning" the treatment. That could take up to 2 weeks to schedule. I looked at Butch and knew, of course, that I would more than likely fall into the category of needing this scan. I just want this treatment...let's get going people. I have a tumor to shrink! No time to waste! The nurse gave us a lot of the details that we needed to know about the actual radiation process. Then we met with Dr. Straus...I really like her. They were trying to get the MRI results from UVA. Well Dr. Staus said (Can you guess what she said? I'll give you one guess) that I would need a CT scan to help her in the planning of the treatment. The results from the scan will help her to give the most radiation dosage to the tumor and the least amount to the other surrounding tissue. I kept trying to recite in my head what Butch always tells me ... Patience Grasshopper. She said that it will be a medium to high dose of radiation but she was going to call Dr. Adams at UVA to make sure of what he wanted for the end result for the surgery. Dr. Major told us that it would be a low dose??? I'm fine with WHATEVER as long as they coordinate what it's suppose to be before they point the gun at my soon to be received "permanent tattoos". I told Dr. Straus that all I ask is that she try to make this CT scan happen as soon as possible. I just feel powerless until we do something to actively shrink the tumor. She left the room to find out about a CT Scan date and I grabbed Butch's hand and prayed out loud. PLEASE GOD, please let this happen sooner than later. PLEASE.

Okay, are you ready for the miracle? Dr. Struas walks back in the room and says...Can you be here tomorrow morning at 7:30? Can I be there?????  Is that what you're asking me...CAN I BE HERE TOMORROW MORNING????? Yes I can with bells on! All those who would consider that a miracle, please raise your hand!

Dr. Straus said that tomorrow will be a long day for me....7:30 in her office and 8:30 for the CT Scan. My dance card is filling up quickly this week! Thursday we'll be back down in Winchester for the brain MRI to rule out brain cancer.

I'm REALLY tired, physically tired. I didn't sleep well last night and am going to try not to take an afternoon nap so that I'm exhausted for tonight so that I can sleep. Butch did ask Dr. Straus if there was an option of a baseball bat to help me sleep at night. Hmmmm, I better check under his bed tonight just to be sure he was kidding.

Yes my dear friends, miracles are my middle name and they are only possible through all of the thoughts and prayers that you have for me.

Beyond the United States of America

It's absolutely amazing to me how life has changed. Okay, yes it's changed significantly for the Funk household within 2 short but very long weeks, but that's not what I'm referring to. 

I'm talking about technology! I remember writing evaluations and IEP's by hand, with white-out very close by. I remember when the first computer was introduced to us at school. You had to use a "floppy disc" and "boot" it up by turning the disc over upon take off. Now we can carry technology in our pocket and touch the screen to make incredible things happen. 

Take this blog for example. I'm able to share the facts, as well as my feelings, with all of my family and friends. But it doesn't stop there. I'm sharing my blog with strangers.  My blog stats tell me that I have had 2,578 page views from the United States, 12 from Russia, 10 from Canada, 3 from the United Kingdom and 1 from Germany. You have to admit...THAT IS COOL!

My baby brother told me tonight that he takes such comfort and joy in reading your blog comments. He knows me pretty well, yet he said that he is learning even more about "who his big sister is" through your comments. Again I say Thank You to my support system and those who chose to take a ticket to ride this adventure with me. As educators, we always say that it takes a village to raise a child. Well I'd like to say that it takes a strong support system of known and unknown people to help the person AND THEIR FAMILY AND FRIENDS affected with cancer.

Sharon's Ark

When my mom was diagnosed with lung cancer, my phenomenal husband supported me by letting me take care of her in our home. I literally had just taken my dad back home from taking care of him from hip surgery. With my mom here, that left my dad "Home Alone". When you don't have anyone to talk to, life can be very lonely.    In walks puppies.......... Someone brought a litter of adorable, pudgy puppies into our preschool class at Sandy Hook Elementary. I decided to bring one of those pudgy puppies home for my dad so that he would have someone to take care of.... to have a purpose for.   When my dad died, Buttons joined our family. Please pay particular attention to her smiling! She adores to lay on her back and spends quite a long time looking at the world from the bottom up.   Our Casey has been most gracious over the last 6 years to having a "woman" rule his life. Buttons tells Casey where he can walk and where he can't. He has been a good friend to Buttons. And then there's Emily. She is such a pretty kitty. She takes her paw across my cheek at night to tell me that she wants to be rubbed behind her ears. When Butch find all of the animals right next to my side, he'll say, "I see that Sharon's Ark is all together".   Yes..... we are all together!

Graduations Galore!

Another beautiful day! Gregory's finance Loren graduated from Old Dominion University with her M.S.Ed. degree. Many of her family gathered to watch the graduation ceremony online. It was PERFECT, after a little snag trying to stream it onto the T.V. was fixed thanks to Gregory saving the day. How incredible technology is, allowing Loren to be part of the ceremony while sitting in her own living room. Her picture was put up on the large screen at O.D.U. in her absence so it was as if she was actually there, walking across the stage to get the recognition she so much deserved.

It was such an honor to have Loren wear the cap, gown and sash from my own master's degree graduation. How life gives little gifts to make memories.

It was such a great day to be a part of Loren's family. Her parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles are such lovely people. Butch and I enjoy sitting back watching how they give Gregory the added family support that we want him to have. Not having family here for our boys to grow up with is hard. Butch and I feel so warm inside when we see the love that Loren's family gives Gregory. It's always been important, but for me now, it is VITAL that he has unconditional love from many people.

I've been so tired today. I slept on and off all morning until we got ready to go for the celebration. Once we got back home, my pain level increased. Luckily the pain pills help. I'm so extremely itchy and while I was thinking that it was still from the "bile backup"...boy could I make a tongue twister using that combination...I'm wondering if I'm allergic to this pain medicine as I was to the morphine. I don't have a rash but do have MANY scratch marks all over from itching my skin to pieces. I'll worry about that one tomorrow, as Scarlet O'Hara would say. I know that I need the strength of the pain medication to help me make it through the night. I can handle the spasms that happen in my "gut" because they're short lived. The cramping isn't.

Butch has lost considerable hours at work over the last year. He's in printing and the industry is suffering. He'll be off tomorrow as a result of fewer hours. We'll use that time off as another gift to be together. We are going to plant some beautiful roses that friends have given me. I love plants with roots, knowing that they will keep on growing forever!

While the outside of our house will be spruced up with new rose bushes, the inside is also looking colorful! All of these beautiful flowers have roots too!!!!!!!

Happiness in Harrisonburg

I went on an exciting out of town trip this evening! Bradley, Butch and I went to his girlfriend Val's JMU Master's Degree Graduation. I went back to my old stopping ground.

The commencement speech given by JMU's president touched me to the very core of my soul. I know that his message was directed to the 300+ graduates and not to the visitor Sharon Funk who was sitting up in the bleachers. Yet it WAS directed right to me from every angle in the convocation center. Bulls Eye right to my heart.

He talked about his experience when he was in the audience of a speech Steve Jobs was giving. I immediately got goose bumps because Steve Jobs and I have something in common. We both have been touched by pancreatic cancer. He said that Steve talked about finding a job that you love and sticking with it. Making a difference in THAT job. I felt so blessed that I have been able to do just that. I have wanted to be a speech therapist ever since I was 14 or 15 years old.

My grandmother had a stroke and as a result was put in a nursing home. My grandma lived in New Jersey, where I was born and lived until 3rd grade. I remember walking with my mom to the telephone booth in Orkney Springs so that she could call her only sibling, Aunt Judy, to find out how Grandma was. I remember my mom telling me that Grandma had lost her ability to speak. A speech therapist was working with grandma to teach her to say her name again. I thought that must be the coolest job in the world. That's what I wanted to be. I wanted to teach people to talk!

I have never wavered from that decision and here it is, after 32 years in the public schools, I have been able to help a countless number of children improve their communication skills. Have you ever thought what it would be like to not be able to communicate? I share with every one of my fellow SLP colleagues in saying that we have! Communication is powerful! What a gift it was to decide so MANY years ago to make a difference in children's lives by helping them communicate. I found the job that I LOVE and am sticking with it.

Harper has HOPE and so do I!

A dear, sweet friend of mine has a precious little girl and adorable infant boy. Harper was throwing sticks into the pond on a family walk while making wishes. She apparently thinks that you can throw ANYTHING into the water and make a wish!  One of  the wishes that Harper made is that Miss Sharon's "thing" shrinks. As she wished this, her mommy thought, "Amen, my sweet little girl." 

Well Harper, you are helping Miss Sharon to have hope. Your mommy and daddy are teaching you how to "really care" for people.Thank you for throwing whatever YOU want into the pond and praying positive thoughts about me. You, my precious little girl, have given me a lot to think about. YOU are giving me HOPE!

No bloggin' cause I was sleepin'

Now snap your fingers and tap your foot as we chant this together...
No blo--ggin' cause you were sleepin',
No blo--ggin' cause you were sleepin'...
No blo--ggin' cause YOU -- WERE -- SLEEPIN'!

You've got to get the snap down pat along with the tap. Try it again...go ahead...try it one more time. You'll get it. No one's watching . I'll let you keep practicing that today. You'll hear the rhythm I'm sending you in my blog. I'm sure of it!

I slept solid from 9:30-11:30 last night, but then woke up as I have historically been doing. I think my gut pain is what woke me up. Butch was afraid for me to take the sleeping pill AND pain pill together. After I piddled around the house a little, which included eating something (footnote my appetite), I took a pain pill because I needed it and tried to go back to sleep. I did! For the first time in over 2 weeks, I actually was asleep through the wee hours of the morning. Ahhh, it feel so good.

I'm crying purple tears

My dear Catoctin family,

I just opened my email because after all, a school day is not complete without checking just one more time. My purple tears are flooding my lap. I could have been put at any school in Loudoun when I transferred there 12 years ago. How was I, Sharon Funk, given the INCREDIBLE gift of working with such FANTASTIC, CARING, GENUINE PEOPLE! I see hands made into hearts, baby bellies with purple on, purple bow ties because it is Wednesday. I see my family....every single purple one of you. I'm in tears...happy tears, happy purple tears! I love you all so very much. Sharon

Dancing on Rainbows

Butch, Loren and I just got home from my oncology appointment with Dr. Major in Winchester. Here's the information that we've all been waiting for....drum roll please....

• It's stage 1 pancreatic cancer
• He doesn't feel that it's growing at an alarming rate, however pancreatic cancer is not an easy cancer to have.
• I'm scheduled with a radiation doctor for Monday in Winchester. Dr. Major felt that I would start radiation at the end of next week??? but that will be determined by Dr. Stewart. It will be a low dose radiation because they don't want to damage the pancreas for the surgery. More radiation would cause more harm than good.
• At the same time that I start my radiation, I will be given a low dose of ORAL chemo. I will be able to take this chemo by mouth several times a day at home. I will be at home! Catoctin family, does that mean I have to give back my maroon and gold blanket with all the words of hope? I promise to use it at home while taking the chemo pill ... AT HOME!
• He said that Dr. Adams at UVA would not have sat on my bed and talked about the Whipple Surgery if he did not feel that it was a VIABLE option. He would not plan the surgery for the beginning of August if the mass was intertwined in the blood vessels. I remember explicitly Dr. Adams saying the mass was adjacent to the blood vessels.
• I told Dr. Major about the strange sensation that I've been having in my head. When I move my eyes from side to side, I feel very light headed and "hear" a sound as if it's a spinning ceiling fan. With those symptoms, I will be having a brain MRI next Thursday at 7:30 am. to rule out brain cancer. Don't be alarmed. He's ruling it out. He said that if it is brain cancer, he doesn't want me to have to go through all of this for no reason. Perhaps a few more changes need to be made in our prayers to God. Shrinking is still a strong request, but letting this not be in my brain is a biggie too. Dr. Major said he doesn't think that is what it is. He thinks that it could be because I have only gotten 4 hours of sleep within a 24 hour period, with the maximum time that I am sleeping about a hour or hour and a half. He's ruling it out! I consider that a gift that he is giving me. He's doing a conclusive test to be able to put it totally out of my mind. If it is, which it's not, then we'll deal with that then....but it's not. He really doesn't think it is.
• Dr. Major seems to think that the increased pain and spasms that I have in my gut are from having the stents in there. Makes sense to me....makes a lot of sense!
• He said that the surgery in August is a major one...not easy. He is confident that I am having it done by one of the best. You know, it could be that I would have to fly somewhere to have this surgery done. But I don't. The surgeon that is going to do it has already sat on my hospital bed, touched my hand and wrote his name and phone number on a napkin. I'm in excellent hands and only have to drive 90 minutes to get there! I put the napkin in a safe place so that I didn't accidentally use it as a tissue.
• Dr. Major prescribed a sleeping medicine to help me get some quality sleep. I feel like my eyes are sunk into the back of my head (really hard to put eye shadow on, let alone eye liner). 
•  Dr. Major said that he thought I looked familiar when I made the connection with my mom 13 years ago. We left him today as he patted my back and touched Butch's shoulder saying, "See you my friend." We are so lucky!

So with that being the facts my dear friends and family, I am off to sleep. Our sweet girl Loren was a blessing to Butch and I today. She and I actually skipped out to the car.....held hands and skipped! We didn't shed one tear because they weren't needed. Butch said that he thought this was going to be the worst day of his life. It wasn't. We were given hope. I feel like we are dancing on rainbows.

 I actually contemplated while waiting for appointments to be made how I could get the radiation once a day on my way home from school. My darling husband obviously didn't even entertain the idea, but I could make it work if I wanted to. Well, I could. Today gave us hope that I WILL be back in my room at Catoctin, walking the halls with my Catoctin family again, and doing progress reports and IEP's , all the time with a smile on my face.

We are dancing from one color of the rainbow to the next. It feels so good to have hope again!

Dr. Funk's diagnosis

In the hospital, I didn't ask for pain medicine often. Maybe twice at the most. When asked to assign a number to the pain, the worse it got was maybe a 4 or 5. On the night before I was to come home, I developed a bright red patch under my eye. Knowing my body the way that I do, I said to the nurse on duty, who coincidentally was wearing a hospital gown over her clothes, that something was wrong. The "nurse who wanted to be a patient", said that I was allergic to the wash cloth. Um, yeah....NO. I know my body. I later woke up with the bright red patches all over my face and a pain in my side along with my gut. The nurse thought it was that I was rubbing my face. Luckily the pain in my side had her request the GI doctor on call in the ER to come up to take a look at me. He and I concluded that I was allergic to morphine, particularly because my rash was all under my neck too.

I've taken maybe 3 pain pills since being home. I do have a high tolerance for pain so that helps. Well, yesterday the cramping and occasional spasms in the middle of my "gut" (which rhymes with the words "but" and "cut" and can be used with the nonsense words of "lut" and "sut"...I have to keep my school skills sharp...no wonder I don't get many points when I play scrabble or "words with friends") became more constant. Yesterday evening I took a pain pill and another one just now.  My pain level number is increasing to maybe a 7. If I was at school talking about a student, I would make a visual with Boardmaker for easier identification of the pain. Heck with this number system. Anyway, using the advanced medical degree that I have (all mothers have this degree) I had diagnosed that the spasms were a result of having the breathing tube down my esophagus and another tube with a camera and needle on the end rooting around during the ERCP. The cramping was coming from this mass in my pancreas causing havoc with my stomach. Well, Dr. Funk isn't sure why the pain is getting worse. All I can say is that you can stop squeezing my gut at any time now.

I really do have written documentation of my medical degree. Recently, I diagnosed one of my students as having velopharyngeal insufficiency. It was confirmed by the E.N.T. that I was correct. As the speech-language pathologist who referred the student, he faxed the results of his finding to me at school. He thanked "Dr. Funk" for the referral of this child to his office. Yes, not only do I have one report with my title on it, I have two. Luckily Dr. Funk had received a follow up report notifying of his recommendation that my little guy needed surgery to correct the excessive air that was escaping through his nose.