The doctor wanted to make sure that I didn't need an IV antibiotic so the oncologist office asked us to come in on Thursday. We knew I was getting better because I was able to actually put my feet on the floor and stand on them without pain. We didn't want to take another day to go to the doctor but we also knew that we needed to figure out what was going on with the chest tube. Off we went to combine the visits and kill two birds with one stone. (You know, after typing that saying, I decided that I really don't like it. I'm going to change it to "kiss two birds with one peck.")
The PA left it in our hands to determine if my legs/feet were getting better. Because we told him that they were, I wouldn't need the IV but my antibiotic prescription would need to be increased from 7 to 14 days. We told him that the chest tube hasn't drained anything for 5 days; however I was still out of breath. He called over to the Diagnostic Center and got an appointment for a chest x-ray and evaluation by the radiologist of what was going on with the tube.
So off to the Diagnostic Center we went. Luckily everything is in the same Winchester Hospital Complex so it's a matter of going from the front where the oncologist is to the back where the x-rays, sonograms, etc. are. In the car on the way there, I popped a nausea pill because I wasn't feeling well.
Another chest x-ray...completed. I really think that I've had 25+ since having this thing with my lungs happen. Grab my husband and head to where the radiologist is so that they can tell us what is going on with the chest tube. Now, here is where my mistake came in to play. I thought it was going to be as simple as...left lung no longer has fluid in it so the chest tube isn't needed. I was wrong. The x-ray showed that there was very minimal fluid in the right lung! Yeah...my body must have absorbed that fluid! The left lung, however, still has fluid. So now the radiologist had to figure out why the chest tube wasn't draining it? Maybe the tube has a crink in it? He did a sonogram and saw that the tube was in a pocket but that there was no fluid in that pocket. The fluid was in another part around the lung. Our option was to do another "thoro something or other" which is putting the needle in around the lung and drawing fluid out. This is the dreaded procedure that I thought would one day have to be done to the right lung. I didn't think that it would have to be done AGAIN to the left lung.
You have to do what has to be done so I said to go ahead with the procedure. I sent my husband out of the room because he doesn't need to see me cry in pain.
Procedure underway. It hurt, but not nearly as much as it did the last time. They took off 600 ml of fluid again from the left lung. That's the same amount as they took off last time. On my way back from another x-ray, I saw my husband in the waiting room so I waved to him to come back to where I was. Procedure over. Fluid out. The x-ray showed that the lung still had not come back completely but that I could go home. Time to take the chest tube out. They said that it was a quick and easy procedure and that my husband could stay in the room.
Did they not know that it was me and nothing is quick and easy. The string that is suppose to release to be able to pull the drain out did not do what it was suppose to do. When I say I cried out in pain, that is an understatement. It was excruciating. I feel so bad that my husband had to hear me cry out in pain. I was trying to spare him from that. After that was done, the radiologist hugged me and said that never happens. I have to say...I was in sort of a traumatic state for a little while. That pain was one of the most intense I've ever had. I told my husband to please expect that once we got to the car, I was going to cry for more than 3 and a half minutes. I wouldn't go a whole 5 minutes but I WAS GOING TO CRY!
3 comments:
My dear Sharon -
IT IS OKAY TO CRY, whether you be alone, in the presence of family or friends, in the presence of doctors and nurses, or in front of a whole audience. It is okay! You can't keep emotions like that inside, for inside, they become just as toxic as that "thing" was that was in your pancreas. I can promise you that you will feel so much better letting those emotions out. And my friend, with all that you have endured since April, YOU HAVE EVERY RIGHT TO CRY FOR AS LONG AS YOU NEED TO! While medicines help with your physical pain, think of tears as helping with your emotional pain. Shedding tears is a way a shedding emotional pain.
I'll admit that I've shed quite a few tears since April - but they haven't all been tears of sadness. There have been tears of joy at the news that the "thing" had shrunk, and happy tears that surgery was over and was successful, tears of happiness as I see how many lives you are touching in such a positive way all over the world, and even a tear or two of joy as I think of you being restored to good health and being able to shake your booty!
Whether they be sad tears or happy tears, let them flow and rest comfortably in the peacefulness that follows a good cry!
Hope you are able to head out for a weekend drive this weekend to enjoy the beauty of those mountains down your way!
Love,
Kelli
Sharon -
A "post-thought" - I'm no doctor, but I can't help but wonder if crying would actually HELP that lung that is partially collapsed. A natural process of crying is gasping for air - perhaps that gentle gasping for air would help to pull more oxygen into the lung, thus helping to inflate it and keep it inflated. Kind of makes sense to me . . .
Love,
Kelli
Dear Sharon,
It's okay for your eyes to leak. It HAS to be okay because God created you and the ability to cry. I think of crying as a cleansing mechanism. It allows us to deal with all kinds of pain, it relieves our stress, it clears the cobwebs from our brain, and in some circumstances it even makes us smile. All of us cry...and we need to....so don't feel that you have to apologize when your eyes leak. Be glad that they do. And just like after the rain, the sun appears, soon good news will come your way. And then we will ALL cry tears of JOY!!
Keeping you in prayer and sending special love and tons of hugs,
KB
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