Today I had my first public meltdown. There was a reason though that I think you'll agree deserved a meltdown outside the walls of my home.
I went for radiation as scheduled. A dear friend came all the way from Massanutten Mountain to take me. As I walked in and scanned my card to let them know I was there, the receptionist, who usually just says hello, said "Oh Mrs. Funk, there's a problem with you machine today. Let me call back to see if they can do you today." (Beginning of meltdown seen on my face and in my heart). She called back and said that they will be able to do it on the other machine and to go back and change (Ahhh, meltdown beginning to fade).
As I was changing, there was a knock on the dressing room door (Not a good sign). The therapist said that they won't be able to do radiation today (Set stage for the real meltdown). I stood there, realizing that they HAVE to do it today. I can't miss another treatment. I just can't! Just this morning in the mail, I received the scheduled MRI for July 23rd and surgeon's appointment for July 24th from UVA. The MRI is scheduled for 1 month from my last treatment, which was suppose to be June 22nd but is now June 25th. I need this treatment. Tears streamed down my face as I tried to tell them that EVERYTHING is relying on these dates. I didn't tell them that the same week that I find out about surgery is the week of my son's wedding. I wanted to scream out loud (but didn't)...YOU DON'T WANT TO MESS WITH A WOMAN ON DRUGS PEOPLE!
I respectfully said again how important it is that I get this treatment today. I got dressed. I usually see the radiation oncologist on Tuesdays after radiation. They went ahead and put me in a room to see her first. I told her how important it was to get treatment today.
Somehow, what appeared like a very complicated process to "program" the other machine happened in a matter of 10 minutes. I changed again and thanked them about 300 times for the treatment. Tears streamed down my face as I thought about how my world relies on this timeline.
I know now that had I had a meltdown last Tuesday when the machine was broke and couldn't receive treatment, that I would have been absorbed into the schedule for machine #2.
All I can say is that:
--They know that I know that it IS POSSIBLE to receive treatment on the other machine.
--They know that I have meltdowns...respectable meltdowns...but none-the-less, public meltdowns.
--They know, and hopefully will remember, how important my timeline is.
6 comments:
Isn't it amazing how sometimes pure emotion can be even more powerful than words? Good for you for being assertive for yourself! I say the next time a situation like this arises, forget the respectable meltdown and go for the ever powerful 2-year-old meltdown tantrum! It's important to keep those technicians on their toes!
Those releases of emotions and meltdowns, public or private, are part of the fight. Don't hold them in, and feel NOT ashamed by them! Let loose and make your needs known! I am proud of you for making your treatment happen today. You go, girl!
"Warrior" is now what is written on your forehead:)
I think they met the REAL Sharon today.......
Hugs and Lollipops
Peggy
Remember the squeaky wheel gets results.... Seems like Tuesday and the machine have a problem.
Love & Hugs to you ,
Marion
Just like you are an advocate for your SLP children you need to be an advocate for yourself. I am so glad you got action and your treatment. They don't know how important your timeline is!!!! Now they know. You are a fighter and your rights were violated. I am proud of you. Just like you would demand action for Butch, Gregory and Bradley you deserve to be heard.
I am proud of you, they heard your cries!!
Be strong!
You should have seen her in action. She was amazing.
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