A Tisket, a Tasket, a YELLOW and MAROON Basket

Today I received a basket that had an endless bottom. No really, there could not have possibly been a bottom. Humanly impossible. It was delivered by two angels that flew in from the north in their white station wagon. Their wing span was enormous because under their wings, they carried all the love, caring, hope and strength that was sent to Butch, Bradley, Gregory and I from our Catoctin Family. They were entrusted with the responsibility of relaying a very important message. It was delivered not just in words, but in their hearts. YOU, MY DEAR SHARON, BUTCH, BRADLEY AND GREGORY, ARE NOT ALONE.

Change is not easy for me. Never has been. With that said, 12 years ago, I made an important decision to change my job location. I did it for many reasons...some clear to me at that time, some not. Well, the last puzzle piece was added to the "some not" part of why I did it. It was because God knew that one day I would need an INCREDIBLE support system for something that wasn't going to be easy. He knew that when I was given the news that I had cancer, I would need to be surrounded by people that held me in their arms. Really tight in their arms.Twelve years ago, I walked into the doors of Catoctin Elementary School , just a little ol' country girl one and a half hours from home, to wander in the halls with unknown faces and work with unknown children. The fear very quickly vanished...poof....evaporated....because I quickly became part of what is known to our staff as the "Catoctin Family". I don't say those words lightly. The word "Family" just can't be tossed around. That word holds an exclusive coat of armor that is sacred. I am THE LUCKIEST person in the world. I am part of the "Catoctin Family".

I am a person that needs facts. Although I love a great fairy tale, it's hard core facts that drive me and make me the person that I am. Here are the facts as I know them and understand them....

• On Wednesday, May 2nd at 1:45 pm, Butch and I will go to Winchester Oncology to see Dr. Major. He will tell me my course of treatment. From what UVA told us, the treatment will be for 28 days, 5 days a week, M-F. I will get chemotherapy and radiation. The reason that I NEED the treatment (did I mention that I really NEED this treatment?) is because the "thing" in my pancreas is adjacent to vital blood vessels. If they did surgery now, they would have to scrape the "thing" from the blood vessels leaving cancer cells that would spread throughout my body. Yeah...not a good thing. The chemo and radiation treatment's purpose is to shrink the "thing" as MUCH AS POSSIBLE to allow them a large enough margin when they do surgery for it to be away from these blood vessels. I want them to leave their spatulas at home...no scraping allowed because it won't be needed. Dr. Adams told us that it's an 80% chance that it will shrink and a 20% chance that it won't. He said that he had to tell us about the 20% chance that it won't because patients walk into his office sometimes never knowing that it may not. Thank you Dr. Adams for the information... delivered but not accepted because I have MORE prayers being said than there are stars in the sky, sand on the beach, and water in the ocean. Yeah....not an option. Now, let's talk about the coincidences. On May 2, 2006, I found my dad lying in his bed with his beloved dog Buttons by his side. His fight was over. In 1998, I spent a lot of time with Dr. Major but for a different reason. Then it was to be my mom's caregiver as she received chemotherapy and radiation for lung cancer. God has made a connection once again to tell me that he is going to make this okay.
• After my 6 week course of treatment, my body will be given a time to rest before surgery. It just so happens that this "rest period" will be when our youngest son and his finance get married. The events on the weekend of July 28th will be filled with memories. I will be a part of each and every one of those memories. Yeah, someone is clearly making this timeline the best it could be.
• After the wedding in early August, I will go back to University of Virginia hospital for a very invasive and extensive surgery. It's called the Whipple surgery. The head surgeon who will be the lead doctor came into my room on Tuesday night. He's an impressive man...one that Butch and I immediately felt safe with. I will be cut wide open (sorry for lack of a better way to say this but that IS what he said. Note to self....cancel bikini  order from Lands End. Doesn't look like I'll be needing it. Order swimsuit with a grandma skirt. Oh, that's right, they're the kind that I love anyway!) My digestive system will be completely reworked. A chunk of the pancreas will be cut out, taking along with it the "shrunk thing". New paths made, other things cut and sewn together. To be quite honest, I don't know much more than that because Butch won't let me go onto the internet to "search". I made him the promise that I won't so I'll leave it to you guys to search Whipple Surgery to find out those details if you want to. I know that the surgery is 6-8 hours in length and a whole team will be there doing the surgery. One of the GI doctors that we met at UVA told us that if he or any one of his family members needed this surgery, he would want Dr. Adams to do it because he is the best around.  I'm THE LUCKIEST PERSON IN THE WORLD to be an hour and a half away from where this man works. I will be in the hospital for 6-7 days. Don't know about the recovery time but 2 + 2 is 4. 
• And the last fact that I KNOW is that after I recover, I will be going back to my Catoctin Family. I will be sitting in my "suite", working with  my kids, being a part of my faculty, laughing and giggling with my colleagues, friends, family, sitting in faculty meetings with my administration, driving in my carpool with my angels, talking with my student's parents, and doing my job again. I will be a mom to my boys, a wife to my husband, a mother-in-law to my new daughter-in law, a friend to my friends, and a sister to my siblings. These are the facts! They just can't be taken away from me. I won't allow it and neither will my support system.

I didn't take a picture of the freezer full of food, kitchen counter full of food, or envelopes full with hard earned money and gift cards from people that love us. This basket with the endless bottom filled our hearts with such love. Thank you Catoctin Family, thank you.